It’s never an easy bridge to cross when a couple decides that they are going to get a divorce. Divorce is difficult enough on its own, and when you throw kids into the equation it can get downright emotional. Things can quickly start to get stressful between divvying up who gets to take what and there may even be fighting over who gets custody.
Although there is no handbook for how to go about it perfectly, there are a few common mistakes that should be avoided. When it comes to things to try to look out for, here are some of the most common mistakes that parents can make when going through this difficult time.
Acting Like Everything Is Fine
Some parents want to cause the family the least amount of stress possible so they try to sweep emotions under the rug. Rather than being forthright about the circumstances, they refuse to acknowledge the problems at hand and put on an air of everything being the same.
Even though parents intentions may be pure when they do this, it’s actually much more harmful than beneficial.
Acknowledging that something has changed and what everyone can anticipate moving forward is crucial. Otherwise, children may feel confused and like they have no outlet for the emotions they’re going through.
Talking Badly About The Other Parent
When two people decide to get divorced, it’s often because they are angry with each other. They may each feel very righteous about the role that they play and carry anger.
Sometimes this can lead to bad-mouthing the other parent in front of the kids. This causes children to feel as if they need to choose sides and can damage them psychologically. Rather than using your child as a place to air your anger, talk to a friend or family member instead.
Moving Too Quickly Into Another Relationship
Even though couples going through a divorce may be excited to move onto bigger and better things, it’s important to take things slowly when you start a new relationship.
Easing into a relationship with a new person should be dealt with delicately rather than charging forward. Children may not be used to the idea of someone else stepping into the picture. Not to mention if things don’t work out, they may end up losing someone that they’ve become attached to.
Failing To Have a Conversation
It’s important to take a step back and have a conversation with your kids at some point during the divorce to see how they’re feeling about it all.
When parents fail to have an honest and open talk about everyone’s standpoint then things can quickly get out of hand and emotions can run wild.